You're in for a treat. Fascinating Aïda is a British comedy cabaret act that is more than a little dirty. My new favorite number is below.
They been tossing their lewd humor around Europe since the 1980's. Learn more about them here, but really, just watch all of these and then sing the songs softly to yourself while standing in line at the grocery store.
You might not know it from 3rd Bass' 1991 single Pop Goes the Weasel, but there was actually one dude there who knew good great hip hop talent. That dude was MC Serch and he hooked up his friends Sabac, DJ Eclipse, Ill Bill and Goretex who like an urban Voltron, formed Non Phixion.
These guys have some of the smoothest flow you'll ever hear, the samples are great too. I remember hearing a bootleg tape of I Shot Reagan in college (1998? fuck!) and my tiny brain nearly exploded after hearing lyrics like:
Yeah yeah I shot Reagan, fuck a pagan Ate falafel with Menachem Begin Who the fuck is Carl Sagan?
Not even sure I knew what a falafel was at that point of my life, but that's not why we're here today. Today, dear readers we're gonna check out their song Futurama off their 2002 album The Future is Now. Futurama samples a frenetic string section in part of a young James Horner's Shad's Pursuit from the score to Battle Beyond the Stars (1980).
Roger Corman during production of Sharktopus (2010)
Battle Beyond the Stars isn't just your run of the mill sci-fi flick though. It's another producer's (Roger Corman) vision of what the Star Wars script could have been.
So basically, if Dickhead McShitface George Lucas didn't have a huge budget for visual effects this is the kind of thing the world would have known as Star Wars. That said, you know the story - ragtag band of goofball misfits saves the universe. Again. Except there's a snarky spaceship named Nell that looks like space ovaries who would most likely later in life marry KITT from Knight Rider.
Dramatized wedding night photos
Anyway, things have gotten way out of hand here so how about you just check out the hook, and then take a listen to the song.
Welcome to futurama, where the cyborgs will shoot your mama A cross between Terminator 3 and Tutankhamen This is Ill Bill reporting for a new assignment Ready to rock with the ruger nine shining
I'm on an 80's hair metal kick, (Thanks, turntable) and the very best part of it is discovering the weird music videos. Including, but not limited to, this one by the heavy metal band Zebra. Because if there was ever a badass animal that total embodied all those intense heavy metal 1980's guitar solos, it was the zebra! Am I right, ladies?
OK my little empanadas, we've got something special for you today, and hopefully for some days in the future too. I'm gonna resist the temptation to call this column MuZack, because it's too easy, too awful, and no matter where you're from you probably want to vaporize Kenny G. But how about we check out some interesting shit eh? They say nothing is original in music these days, and for the most part those bastards are right. But that doesn't mean what's going on isn't fucking awesome, so let's explore how some movie scores from dear favorites are being chopped and screwed having new life breathed into them as Hip Hop songs.
This week we're learning about a dude named Immortal Technique. OK, his name is actually Felipe, but he's doing some interesting stuff. Immortal Technique, originally from Peru and now a Harlem local since the 80's released a free compilation called The Martyr not long ago which happens to contain one of the best Hip Hop tracks I've heard all year. It's titled Goonies Never Die. That's right. Immortal Technique (Morty to his friends) uses Dave Grusin's Theme to The Goonies and does it with style and all the angst of an Astoria, Oregon fledgling misfit. Some sample lyrics:
I'll put your hand in a blender to make an entree
Then cut your dick off and glue it back on the wrong way
And the hook:
All my revolutionary soldiers better ride
My word is mathematics bitch, numbers never lie
So even if they tell you I'm dead I'm still alive
Because motherfucker, Goonies never die
All this is tied together with some voice overs from a cute kid who calls his uncle out for being a gangbanger. I think Dave Grusin approves.
Don't you?
so The Dorktress doesn't get bored of entertaining us with interesting stuff.